4 Things Ugly Selfies will cause

1. You will attract ugly people. Ugly attractions lead to ugly relationships. Ugly relationships lead to ugly marriages. And, ugly marriages lead to ugly children. Ugly children can’t continue your legacy. We all know Americans honor a good legacy…

2. No job. Ugliness is bad for potential partnerships. A pretty face goes a long way. They can’t be stagnant with your ugly self, won’t prosper. Your resume/portfolio may be tip top. But once the employer matches the face you’ll present a risk. They can’t move forward in the hiring process…

3. You may need to take the citizenship naturalization test. Not, because the government thinks you’re from another country… but, because you’re sitting up in your profile picture looking like a transformer. I’m sure that’s a threat to humanity. Can’t have that…

4. On applications and standardize test you can’t check “male” or “female” without questioning. HR would have to develop an unknown section for you. That’s unnecessary paperwork. Americans hate unnecessary paperwork.

So do us all a favor. Honor your legacies, build the economy, and save the trees… by uploading a different angle with your selfies.

If Hollywood made “Halloween in the Ghetto” Nene Leakes would be cast as Michael Myers

 

I  want you guys to take a moment, and observe this picture. I want you to go into deep thought… compare and contrast. There’s no way on earth, you can’t tell me that this isn’t an exact replica. Dammit! Nene Leakes is Michael Myers. They were created in each others image. You know how I know… because both of their heads are JACKED UP. Nene hair look like Willy Wonka discovered her with the Oompa-Loompas from Loompaland in 1971. I mean what was she thinking? Head look like a freshly woven beehive.  Like a basket  full of rising yeast. Get it together Nene. Now Mike ass, not to far behind. Believe it or not, he’s one of my favorite movie characters. It cracks me up how he always manages to steal a car… when the hell did he get a license? Anyway I be pissed off, because Mike’s hair is hideous. How in the hell are you a FAMOUS monster, and your hair has split ends? They couldn’t oil his scalp before his first killing? Y’all know Mike’s hair is bad. He be walking in the midst of a windy autumn night, and not a strand of hair be moving. Mike got that pure village people hair. All I’m saying is get him some coconut oil, a perm, or a sew-in.